Ships of the Desert / Stallions designed by Committees

This is apropos of Sweet Fanny Adams, as they say where I come from, which is a polite way of saying Sweet F.A. which is a polite way of saying. Well, I’m sure you’re not totally as dim as ditch-water. I have no idea why Camels suddenly sprang to my mind, I haven’t seen any since the Circus came to town about a year or more ago and I haven’t read anything memorable about them recently.

Although, speaking of the Circus, I seem to recall that they had ‘Trained Cows’ as a major attraction, ‘The Only Ones in the Whole Wide World’. I didn’t unfortunately get around to seeing them, so I can’t comment further.

To get back to camels, without going into Wikipedia and relying solely on my memory. There are two types, the one humped variety called Dromedaries and the two-humped ones called Bactrians. I’m not real sure which of them are known as ‘Ships of the Desert’, as both of them live in deserts. Dromedaries on the fringes of the Sahara in North Africa and Bactrians live happily up around the Gobi in Mongolia.

Dromedaries are the sleek beauties of the Camel world, not only are they bred as beasts of burden. Some are selected for their racing prowess, in much the same way as Arabian Racehorses. To the untrained eye, they may look like cumbersome beasts (the Camels not the Horses), but to a Sheik with a wad of Riyals burning a hole in his pocket, they are a thing of beauty.

I read somewhere that the ‘Jockeys’ were originally young lads, but this was frowned upon, in much the same way as sending young lads up chimneys in Dickensian England. I think they tried replacing them with monkeys, which wasn’t too successful so eventually they stuck robots up on the hump. I have my doubts about this and think that could be the ‘Wicked Western Media’ taking the Mick!

The Bactrians are another kettle of fish, or if you prefer, a different cup of tea (one hump or two?). Sorry about that! I guess it had to rear it’s ugly head somewhere!

Speaking of ugly heads. If, as sometimes stated “a camel is a racehorse designed by a committee,” then they were obviously referring to the Bactrian. Not even it’s mother could love one of these critters. Although, I have to confess that I have never seen a baby in the flesh or even a photo of one. For all I know, they could be as cute as kittens and puppies.

I do not have a photograph of a fully grown camel handy and even if I did, I’m too stupid as to know how to post it on here, so you’ll have to Google it for yourself.

Cheers for now,

SkyBlueSkull

P.S. I’ve just remembered now, where I recently saw a camel. My son was watching a DVD of ‘Lawrence of Arabia’ a few days ago. As I was walking past, I saw a scene where an urchin stuck a stick up a camel’s bum’ole, causing the camel to take off at speed with ‘Jenkins’ temporarily on board.

P.P.S. If you want to know the joke about bricking camels, you’ll have to email me on kskel5@hotmail.com