Polymaths and Jack’s of all trades

I consider myself to be a bit of a Polymath, the dictionary definition is “A person of much or varied learning”. If this seems a bit presumptuous of me, I hasten to add that I’m not comparing myself with Da Vinci, who was the Great Grand Daddy of all Polymaths. That guy was a genius, not only a great painter and sculptor but also an inventor of helicopters and codes (Read Dan Brown if you don’t believe me, 2nd thoughts don’t bother, it’s a load of crud).

I don't consider myself an equal of Galileo, Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell, Carl Sagan or a host of others too numerous to mention, including Arthur V. Throgmorton.

No! I’m a fourth rate Polymath, which really means that my brain flutters all over the place like a butterfly with A.D.D. I am totally incapable of retaining vast amounts of knowledge on a particular subject in my memory. I can read heaps about something and retain it for about 24 hours and then it all disappears, leaving only a residue, which can be dredged up at odd times, usually inappropriately.

Some people are capable of storing an incredible amount of data on a subject that really interests them. For instance, I have met people who can recite the names of all the race horses that have won the major races all over the world since 1909. Of course, they do this to the exclusion of virtually everything else and nobody can ever contradict them, actually people actively ignore them and who wouldn’t?

This also applies to various professionals, including Medical Specialists, who is ever going to question a Proctologist over his knowledge of bums and bowels, apart from another Proctologist? Even General Practitioners have to know so much about all the different ailments, that they forget how to change a light bulb and sometimes put their Y-fronts on the wrong way round.

What about Lawyers, what is the difference between slander and libel? (I used to know, but I’ve forgotten) and who won that case back in 1959, Throgmorton v The Crown and Anchor? The world today is a specialists oyster, you’ve got Criminal Lawyers, Bankruptcy Lawyers, Taxation Lawyers and even Lawyers who specialise exclusively in contracts for Unsynchronised Swimmers and Dipsomaniac Darts Players.

We Polymaths are no longer relevant to society, anachronisms is what we are! We can no longer use bullshit to baffle the brains of the best in barroom arguments, because some smart-arse will pull out a Mobile Phone with an Internet connection to prove us wrong.

So what has all this got to do with Jack’s of all Trades? you might ask. Well, nothing really I suppose, handymen will always be just that, men who are handy with their hands. Although I would have to say that GP’s are the ‘Jacks’ of the medical profession.

We’re never likely to see the day where a mobile phone can change a tyre, but even handymen have trouble tuning up the computers hidden under the bonnets of cars or importing photos onto blog sites and sometimes put their Y-fronts on the wrong way round. Which can be seen by the general public, when they bend down and show their bum-cleavage.

Just in case you’re interested, I wouldn’t qualify as a handyman’s left boot and I wear ‘Jocks’ and sometimes have them inside out and upside down.

Cheers for now.

SkyBlueSkull.